Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Cindy Crawford Nude....(Kinda)

This pic should really get the view totals revved up! Yes, that is 40-something Cindy Crawford trying on a little shaving cream, or soap suds, or DROOL…. for size……… Surely that will garner some views…….

Not much new here today. I would give you a play-by-play description of the dishes I washed and details of me cleaning the living room……but you would be better served to wait and buy the Blu-Ray DVD when it comes out.

Tomorrow is the day I do my wife’s laundry so I have to be sure to set my alarm clock because I sure don’t want to be late for that excitement….

Being a Disabled Househusband is just about as much fun as a person should legally be allowed to have…..

I need to get my 4yr old nephew to change my ring tone on my cell phone. I have no clue how to do it myself and I am getting tired of “FUNKYTOWN” blasting out loud at the worst possible moments. Sitting in a stall in a deathly quiet restroom with “Won’t you take me to….FUNKEEEEEEEE-TOOOOOWWNNNNN!!!” blasting as you fumble around in your wadded up pants is pretty embarrassing.

While volunteering at DFW Airport yesterday I met a passenger from my Home State of Oregon that was not exactly the sharpest tool in the shed….

Oregon Man (OM) – “Do you know if there is a time difference between Texas and Oregon?

ME – “Yes Sir, we are two hours ahead of Oregon…”

OM – “Whoa…..”

ME – “I am from Eugene myself….”

OM – “And you volunteer here?”

ME – “Yes”

OM – “And you live in Eugene?”

(Man has puzzled look on face trying to comprehend the driving time involved with living in Eugene, Oregon and driving to the DFW Airport to Volunteer….)

ME – “No, I live here…..have so for the last 20 years….”

OM – “Whoa…”

You gotta understand the typical Oregon resident. The chances of his brain cells being literally baked and fried on a large amount of illegal homegrown substances…..was EXTREMELY high…..

The kid brought home another booklet full of crap that his school is selling to raise money. The poor parents and relatives of the kid never have a chance….we HAVE to buy whatever the kid is selling. I ask him…”What are you selling now?” He grins…..”Greasy pork sandwiches rolled in an ashtray to be eaten in front of a warm fan”

I grimace….”We’ll take 10 please…..”

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